Proceed with Caution!

What can I say about relationships? Well, I can say relationships are still difficult for many of us. There are many aspects as to why more relationships fail than succeed; however, if the constant denominator of one failing after another points back to you, then a change needs to be made in you not the people you previously had a relationship with.

It is hard for any of us to admit you are not perfect; so why do you expect someone else to be? I know because, I was a person who judged and criticized but would get offended when my spouse would do the same to me. So don’t point the finger at the other person when you are the instigator. Nope it’s not easy to take a good look at you, but it’s necessary! Start today and begin to take responsibility for you and you only. To say, “Well he/she was yelling too”; or “Well he/she hit me first”, or “He/she stayed out all night, so I did it so they know how it feels”, or my all time favorite, “Well he/she cheated first, so I did it too”!

Whoa! Stop, Sit down, and count backwards from 100! It’s a challenge most people will accept; however, you will hesitate, draw a blank at times, and skip some numbers. If you don’t believe me, try it now ~ and count fast, just like counting forward. I know you are asking what this has to do with relationships, if you watch people do this, the concentration is profound and they keep at it until they get it right! Aren’t you and a healthy marriage worth the determination to get it right too?

Most of your behavior and characteristics are subliminally taught at home that can hinder a healthy relationship, but it is not the determining factor. As mentioned, you have to take responsibility for your own actions and admit your faults. Once we become an adult, whatever you endured as a child or experienced, should not continue to dictate bad behavior in you. Forgiveness is healing and needs to be present so you can become whole and happy.  You might have had an abusive parent, a parent who is critical, loud and obnoxious, or who lives in fear of trying new things; more than likely you will adopt the behavior. Don’t get discouraged though because there is always hope and anyone can change, with God’s help, from Glory to Glory if they so desire!

The union or marriage will have problems, but the problem solver is God and He never loses a battle! He always has a simple solution to what we think is a huge problem; and He is the first step to a healthy and lasting relationship. 

Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud, never haughty or selfish or rude. Love does not demand its own way. It is not irritable or touchy. It does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong. It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins out. If you love someone, you will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. You will always believe in him, always expect the best of him, and always stand your ground in defending him.

All the special gifts and powers from God will someday come to an end, but love goes on forever. I Corinthians 13:4-8 TLB